the loco days of locolorenzo

Never really choosing to go away...........

2009-05-29T12:27:00.002-05:00

Well, to my few readers.....I'm back! Just sitting here reflecting on my life, and thinking that in order to help preserve my sanity, even writing a few sentences every couple of days would really help.
So what has happened since I've left y'all? I might as well try to remember it all!
Well, I've worked almost every holiday except New Year's....work is fine, the hospital has really been a 2nd home to me. I am growing into my confident role as a RN, even when the patients go "oh, it's so nice to see a nice young man..." If they only knew! I can spout reasons for any intervention we do....and happily BS my way through some conversations if I need to! I'm working a 2nd job at a local nursing home on a PRN basis...it's nice to have some familiar people to work with...
Personally, I moved out of my rental house in March...Got broken into TWICE within 2 months of each other...basically all they got was 2 laptops and made a mess of the place. But the 2nd time, I moved all my valuables over to a friend's house, and the next morning the cops called cause they had kicked in the door! (too bad for them I didn't have anything else left there!)
And I'm writing this next to the most beautiful woman in the world....my new fiance. I never thought that I would ever meet anyone so sweet, kind, open, beautiful and understanding. Her love and joy for what I do(and her mom does also) is infectious....and no matter how rough the shift, I know that she understands. So hopefully I'll be posting a few more things on here, but until then...."A fool blathers on, a wise man listens more than speaks."

Gone.

2008-10-26T19:38:00.002-05:00

This is to announce that I am closing my blog for a undisclosed period of time. I just do not have the time for it, and after looking back over the last 20 days, I just have nothing really important to share. I still plan to comment on certain ones, and lurk through the blogosphere, but I cannot continue to give the time that this requires. Good luck to all, and peace be with you.

If you start off having a bad day....

2008-10-06T23:34:00.001-05:00

It can just take a moment to change it around.
I was frazzled the other day....behind, had a admit, day nurse kept me in report 1/2 hr past time I should have been done, had a hep drip PTT coming due soon(so I'd have to change the rate), etc....all at at start of shift.
I went in to see my one stable patient....and he asked for tylenol instead of vicodin...ok, sure. After getting those for him he said "you have a minute?" (seriously, at this moment, I wanted to say "not really, could it wait a bit?") But, I always say sure because they may not tell you what they wanted to earlier....
He says "I wanted you to know that you are the best nurse I've ever had. You really care about your patients. You always take the time to explain things to me, and you told me when you didn't know. The other nurses have been pushing that vicodin and I don't want it....nurses do a good job and people probably don't say that enough."
I almost wanted to go cry a little.....I told him thanks, and we proceeded to have a better night. Let me just say that I had a little more bounce when I left that room....so take the time to listen to your patients...they might be the ones giving you what you needed.

reflections

2008-09-30T16:27:00.002-05:00

I feel something stirring in me that has been lying dormant for a long time. The swelling in the heart when I see a certain person. Thinking about them when I find myself with down moments. Knowing that things are still new, so perhaps I'm just overwhelmed with a sense of "new date" envy. I don't find excuses to break a date, I am just at ease out on the town, or sitting still watching movies.
I worry about how quickly I seem to be changing. Priding myself on always being a rational observer of my life, and tending not to get lost in dreams of long term plans.
But is it so wrong to WANT to share this life with someone? Sooner rather than later? Aching to fill a void that I have been aware of for years?
I have friends...that I know. But, there is only so much time that can be spent in that company.
I'm growing up. A career, a life, a love....the things I ache for. Career is satisfied, and somedays is very tough. Life...the days I spend, often just back and forth, waiting for the hour of bed, running errands, waiting.....
Love. I find it lacking, but I am prone to getting my heart broken quickly....I shy away from emotion, lest I be destroyed. I find that, although cliche, the "walls around my heart" metaphor is quite apt. When I find someone, I try not to scare them away...or show too much of me at once.

I put this out there for all to see: I believe in love. I believe I am falling in love. Is it love? I do not know, I think it may be. But, I know enough to minimize my heart's investment, until I know for sure. If you have love....hold it. Feed it everyday, and know that a tender plant dies if it is not fed.

Be on time.

2008-09-30T16:24:00.002-05:00

Alone in the dark,
I hear my squeaking shoes.
Black pleather slapping tiles
as I attempt to quietly open doors.

I hear sleep sounds,
snores so deep they sound like cave monsters.
Hoping that the pulse ox's
show good perfusion.

I wait for the daylight to arrive,
to leave and go home.
My slumber time put off
by inconsiderate coworker.

Arriving on time is expected,
not a suggestion.
If I arrived 25 minutes late,
someone would notice....mainly boss.

Please remember that while I wait for you,
I am usually considerate enough to be on time.
Repeat, blather, repeat.
Good night.

Beating my head against the wall.

2008-09-22T15:55:00.003-05:00

So, this week, I have to change shifts for 36 hours of classes geared to new grad RNs. It's good, got there a little early and was able to visit with a few of the girls I went to school with....catching up, seeing what they do that's cool, and making plans for a out of work get-together....
However, for every plus, there is a minus....Which is that it was just like being back in nursing school. Why do some people feel the need to be rude during presentations, having their private little jokes, laughing (not) quietly, and otherwise making the rest of us look bad? We're professsions, darn it...let's act like it.
Then, the main nurse who was the ringleader started complaining to our product vendor who did our lunch about how our swab kits are tough to do, we don't have solutions to help cut bacteria down in the mouth, people put the swab kits in drawers, they take long to finish, etc....well, let's see. (she works on a med/surg floor, I work on a surgical/ortho/neuro...with tubes and NPO patients at times, so I use the kits as well.)
The kits contain a lot of mouth swabs, chapstick, mouthwash. However, if she had been listening during the presentation, she would have heard the vendor say "now, when you're not using the chlorohexidine, you burst this HYDROGEN PROXIDE bubble and let it sit for a minute...then swab."
So...to wrap up my argument against hers....
A. Mouth care takes maybe 5 minutes, max. If the swabs are in the drawer, then take them out and put them on bedside table. Do it after you're done assessing, before you leave the patient.
B. Solution that cuts down some bacteria: Hydrogen proxide(in our pyxis) mixed with water...just like when you have a toothache and gargle with it. (not to mention the vendor mentioned it in his product.)
C. I don't mind people...I mind stupid people with little to no basic nursing knowledge, who don't think/listen, and then wonder why they get no respect.

On the plus side, the classes are interesting(for the most part) and I'm getting lots of material to write about....so it'll be alright. I'm dragging today, slept little yesterday, and I'm not used to waking up at 730am....hope all is well with my readers!

work and a date.

2008-09-14T19:23:00.002-05:00

First...thanks to the 1 follower I have on here...Jacob from Raspberry Blase!

Overall, things are going well. I finally got back on the night shift, and realized how much I missed my night crew. I've been working up to 3-4 patients, and even did my first night discharge...at 8:30pm, trying to take care of all my other patients ahead of time....so go figure.
Outside of work, I haven't done much....however, I did have a (semi) blind date today. A nurse who works the night shift on the unit next door to mine had asked me if I had myspace....seriously, who doesn't? Then, I received a message from her daughter....so, nothing to it, right?
Her daughter is younger, but nice....and we happened to spend about 5 hours together today. For the women, is it a good sign when she takes your arm, you hold the umbrella, and you have good conversation for the entire date? And I even got a kiss as I walked her to her car....good times. So wish me luck!

picture personality test

2008-09-03T15:01:00.000-05:00

This was one of those cool web tests....

Your result for The Perception Personality Image Test...

HBPS - The Optimist

Humanity, Background, Big Picture, and Shape

You perceive the world with particular attention to humanity. You focus on the hidden treasures of life (the background) and how that fits into the larger picture. You are also particularly drawn towards the shapes around you. Because of the value you place on humanity, you tend to seek out other people and get energized by being around others. You like to ponder ideas and imagine the many possibilities of your life without worrying about the details or specifics. You are in tune with all that is around you and understand your life as part of a larger whole. You prefer a structured environment within which to live and you like things to be predictable.

The Perception Personality Types:

http://www.helloquizzy.com/tests/the-perception-personality-image-test">Take The Perception Personality Image Test at

100 things to eat....

2008-09-01T18:56:00.003-05:00

Very Good Taste posted a list of 100 things every omnivore should eat. You're supposed to go through it and mark what you've eaten, to see where you stand when compared with the ideal.
Here 'tis....
1. Venison
2. Nettle tea*
3. Huevos rancheros*
4. Steak tartare*(got me sick in Mexico)
5. Crocodile*
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue*
8. Carp*
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari*
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich*
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart*
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes*
19. Steamed pork buns*
20. Pistachio ice cream*
21. Heirloom tomatoes*
22. Fresh wild berries*
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans*
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper (once in my HS biology class, what a sadist)*
27. Dulce de leche*
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl*
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut*
35. Root beer float*
36. Cognac with a fat cigar*
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O*
39. Gumbo*
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects*
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more*
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel*
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut*(duh, I live in the Midwest!)
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear*
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal*
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini*
58. Beer above 8% ABV (duh)*
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips*
61. S’mores*
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs*
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake (State Fair, duh)*
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain*
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill...mmmm deer off the side of the road.
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie*
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong (my favorite tea)
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict*
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare*
87. Goulash*
88. Flowers(dandelion tea)*
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam*
92. Soft shell crab*
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish*
95. Mole poblano*
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake (State Fair, duh)

take me out to the ballgame....

2008-08-31T22:00:00.002-05:00

If you have a small class A through AAA ballpark in your city, go support it! Being labor day weekend, I knew that tonight was the last game for our local independent league team....I figured I'd just go check it out. $10 for a good seat(9 rows behind home plate), $10 in beer, and $5 for a big sausage dog, and FREE parking! So I saved about 30-40 bucks in parking, gas, and ticket prices.....beer was about the same.
I just chilled out with a beer for the first few innings, and watched the family of about 8 enjoying the game(although once a foul ball rolled off the roof, the kids kept looking up and back).....just watched the every 1/2 inning promotions(sumo wrestling, tshirt cannons, even a split the pot...)
So for a 2.5 hour game, it was mildly entertaining....although once the other team scored 7 runs in the 2nd, I lost most interest in the game....
I drove about 45 minutes there, but it was worth it for the entertainment value.......anyone else have any big plans for tomorrow?

I'm sorry....but I cannot help.

2008-08-30T19:10:00.002-05:00

You want a good example of the problem of the uninsured in america? Take my patient today. He was getting discharged for his skull fracture. Still some problems with dizziness. headache. that happens when you get a concussion for falling off a ladder....
However, then when you are good to go...told to follow up with the doctor, then you start saying..."Well, what about my chest pain?"
What chest pain? "I've had it off and on, when I move, and when I stretch." Ok, sir, that's due to the muscles healing....you had a EKG downstairs when you arrived to the ER, and that showed no blockage or cardiac problems..also, you haven't been getting treated for that. "well, how about a test for blockage?"
Ok, sir...the doc has told you to follow up as a outpatient for that. "well, I don't have insurance." Ok, if you're concerned about paying your bill, you can contact our financial services department...and they will work with you.
"do you have samples of vicodin or anything you can send with me?"
No, sir, I'm afraid I don't.
"well, I can't get around."
Sir, here is a bus schedule and a cab voucher so you can at least get to one appointment or out once. After that, I would suggest that you talk to a friend or family member. Ok, sorry. I wish I could do more.
"You've done nothing for me."
(THAT was what pushed me over the edge. I said, "well, then let me take back that prescription your cab voucher, your bus schedule, throw up those pain meds we just gave you, etc...not really, but it would've been nice.)
The negative thing is that he expected all this to be done, but didn't say a peep until 1 hr before he was to be discharged. I just work here sometimes.
Hopefully a positive post next!

my first time as "that nurse"

2008-08-22T21:08:00.000-05:00

I'm a new grad. That in itself means I haven't been nursing too many patients, but I was a CNA for 2 years. I've taken care of so many patients it's hard to pick just one who made a difference. But then with my RN, I can finally take the time to do what needs to be done for a patient. And people listen!
I'm working the 2nd of 3 shifts. Early in the morning, "beth" comes in. She's getting a new port for chemo. Extensive cancer history and new lesions at the moment. She's scared, hungry and thirsty. Her old port is leaking yellow fluid (think lymph fluid) on occasion. She's scared that the new one isn't going to work. I spent a good 20 minutes in there to reassure it that she'll be ok.She went down in midday, and came back as I was leaving. She was groggy, but she was in good spirits.
Today, I went in to see her and she said to me "hey, come here." With a very serious expression on her face. She then smiled and said "thank you for taking such good care of me and my mom yesterday. I told all my family you were the best nurse i've had in years!" I'm not worthy, I'm still SOOOO new! I immediately felt like bawling, but i'm a professional, right? (I held it in for about 10 mins). I told her the plan of getting her up, seeing how she did, then talking about what we could do for her for getting her to rehab, home, or to a facility.
She only wanted to go home, or be "safe" in the hospital. She got up, sat in a chair, got around and was doing ok. She gave me a lecture about nascar...and how a race at bristol is better than anything in the world. She teared up a little, but she seemed in good spirits. She made sure to tell me that she was going to be doing 2 Fs today..."fast and furious, baby!" As I left today, I told her I'd see her tomorrow. and she said, "Maybe I'll suprise you, and run off! After all, wouldn't they think you scared me away?" With a big wink.
good night, beth. We'll do what we can. But if I could have a thousand patients like you, I'd be ok(but dehydrated from crying!)

tips for new nursing students.

2008-08-14T21:30:00.000-05:00

Well, someone else in the blogosphere had the idea of posting some tips for new nursing students...so as a future nurse educator, I figured I would post some of my own...take them at face value.
1. Nursing school is HARD.
This is not the time to be out partying every weekend, not study, blow off papers, etc. Most classes only have x number of points. Miss something or bomb, and you have to work harder to make it up. One of my friends failed our last semester by 3 points....and she missed 1 5 point quiz. So every point matters.
2. However, don't become absorbed by nursing school.
It's a lot. careplans, studying, papers, tests, dealing with others. Schedule some time to yourself once a week. a movie, cooking, reading, something you enjoy. It's easier to go back to nursing stuff if you aren't sick of it.
3. You may get the psycho instructor- It's true, you hear horror stories about every instructor. If you get one that drives you nuts, remember, you MUST follow what they say...even if it makes you question your sanity. It's only one semester, you can do it. just be professional, and ask questions if you aren't sure what to do.
4. some of your classmates can drive you crazy- It's a fact that some of them are crazy themselves. be professional, friendly, but you don't have to associate with them outside of school.
5. Find a study group or a close group of NS friends to vent to- only fellow nursing students understand what your going through...I don't know where I'd be without them.
6. Always ask questions to floor nurses...especially if it's one who enjoys teaching- and you can tell.
Hope this helps!

He's a bad mother...shut yo mouh!

2008-08-10T19:15:00.002-05:00

I'm talking bout shaft!....SHAFT! It's too bad to hear he's gone. Even as a chef in colorado, he was always a source of advice....wait, he was a singer? dang. Peace, salty balls.

On a side note, when a patient repeats whatever he hears....saying "oh, S***" as a antibiotic starts running down your crotch is probably not the best idea...especially when he repeats it in front of family.

COS is up!

2008-08-07T11:30:00.002-05:00

Change of Shift is up over at Emergiblog! http://www.emergiblog.com/2008/08/change-of-shift-volume-3-number-3.html

NEVER forget where you come from.

2008-08-05T19:42:00.003-05:00

The simple touch of a hand in the dark,
a warm blanket in the chill of cloudy day.
The hand you need to hold when you go pee,
the hand you need to squeeze while you get poked.

I don't agree with passing the buck,
hunting down busy techs for a simple thing.
I don't believe that a tech can do something I can't do for them,
or that what they say does NOT have merit.

Do it yourself for a change,
find the heart to do 1 task a hour for a tech.
Relieve your load, get rid of your high horse,
and lend your heart to care.

NEVER be above helping out! It is appreciated more than you know!

So, the orientation rolls on...

2008-08-04T19:27:00.002-05:00

So, I've got 6 shifts down....and I think I roll with the punches pretty good. I've had up to 6 patients, done discharge teaching on a knee, admitted patients, called doctors for orders, and done what I've had to do.
I've dealt with the docs that ignore us, the ones that seem very friendly, and the ones who are in the middle. But, what I can't understand is why a doc won't call us back for a patient....especially when it's a stat and I've paged 23 times over 2 hours for a B/P of 89/48....geez.
I've got 5 hours of IV sticks ahead of me tomorrow....so it's gonna be a long day. Any suggestions?

Life outside of the hospital....

2008-07-27T11:11:00.002-05:00

You know, I've been living and breathing this nursing thing for so long already that I honestly can't remember the last time I actually had a life outside of work or school.
But I do now. It gets easier with the income to actually go places, see people, and do stuff. So I've made dinner for the girlfriend (and she actually liked it! that bodes well for the 1st dinner!), we sat around and watched movies (Bank job- meh. little long. And Juno- which was remarkably snarky, but pretty good overall) and we talked....and talked. It's starting to remind me what it was like to do things with other people.
Planning to go spend my B&N giftcard today, and maybe stop off for a beer somewhere on the drive with the cubs game....but outside of that, nothing is planned. And I've still got 2.5 more days off! This whole "orientation" thing where I can't pick up hours is pretty cool....
I'm looking at cruises/vacations for the fall...any suggestions?

my first day as a RN!!!!!

2008-07-23T19:20:00.002-05:00

Wow. Years spent in school, and life choices brought me to this point. You see, today was my first official day as a staff RN! A lot of training awaits, but I could not wait to get to work today, and I slept about...oh, 4 hours!
At no point did I understand what I was getting myself into, and what a RN really does.....so today was a real wake up call.
Admitting patients, trying to explain different things, getting concerned over the sleepy LOL from surgery, and trying to get someone's pain under control. What a day. But, I clocked out with the most IMMENSE satisfaction that I could ever imagine. To all my fellow nurses: NEVER forget that job satisfaction should be part of your job everyday. If it's not, find it! life's too short!

Orientation in the classroom

2008-07-20T16:05:00.002-05:00

Ok, I'm sick of looking at computer screens to orient. I need to get to the floor and actually interact with patients....I'm just bored! Seriously, though, class is going well...we've learned this neat relaxation technique, and learned the computer system....but I just can't wait to get to the floor. But that's all at the moment.

getting more and more nervous....

2008-07-11T14:38:00.002-05:00

So, my OFFICIAL pass letter came today....and yes, it was accompied by yet another form asking me for $50 to process and send my RN license. You know, if I could just pay x dollars at once, it wouldn't be so bad. Instead, you get these little bleeding amounts that mean you have to figure out where you have the money at, and how much you need until that first check, and how much more you need to get you by for groceries, and which bills will have to wait a month...
(sighs) I'm beginning to think I should have kept working...but the time have has recharged my batteries...and I'm actually excited/nervous to start doing the floor work...which means I must be stir-crazy bored. Somebody remind me of this fact when I start complaining about the floor.

what school really taught me...

2008-07-08T12:01:00.000-05:00

85%DRUNKARD

Created by OnePlusYou

just saying...

what nursing teaches you about real life....

2008-07-06T13:05:00.000-05:00

So, after a few weeks off, it hit me. My life has been greatly blessed by the ABILITY to touch so many people through my words and deeds. My knowledge helps teach people how to be or get better, and how to enrich their personal lives.
I am not a NASTY nurse. I am a firm believer that your attitude on the clock determines what kind of shift you're going to have. You can't change the patients, you can't change the orders, but you CAN change how you react to it.
Personally, I believe that this is why my personal life has been the smoothest it's ever been. I enjoy the world, the annoyances don't seem to bother me as much anymore, and my friends have never seemed so important!
After 4 years of not really having any kind of relationship, I now have choices when it comes to who I WANT to spend my time with. I value the time I have been spending with 2 or 3 select people who seem to make the days go by faster....and fill them with hope and the promise of change.

Day 2 of 10.........

2008-07-05T11:18:00.002-05:00

So, as a favor to my dad, I agreed to let him get out of town this week....before I start orientation. It's only day 2 out of 10...and I'm bored....it's tough to imagine that he does this all the time. I'm taking care of my grandmother...basically it's cooking meals, emptying commodes, changing the bed, company. Noting too major, so go figure....
Thank god that some system around here is working...it took about 30-45 mins for my computer to find the connection, but it eventually comes online...so it's a good deal. Won't be doing any shopping online here, but it's good to be able to check in on things...other than that, I guess I better go read out with my grandmother at the table...keep her a little company...

hmmm...what have I done?

2008-07-02T13:30:00.002-05:00

answer: Not a dang thing. Trying to catch up on reading, clean the apartment, get things together for licensure/orientation, It's hard to believe I have exactly 12 days until I start my new job! In fact, yesterday I got a email with my scheduled plan for orientation. 6 days of classroom, and 2 days of floor work for the first 2 weeks...then floor work. Then classes again in September. I'm looking forward to it.
One of my friends just took NCLEX today, and got 90 some questions...I'm sure she passed though. So, crossing fingers for her.
I also have a call into valpo university about their RN-MSN program. I know I just got out of school, but if I can get through some pre-reqs before concentrating on a MSN in education, that would be really cool.
On a side note, I thought I'd comment on the news story making the rounds about the woman who died in the ER waiting room. Apparently, that facility has other state complaints against it. It's sad to see that indifference can be so ingrained in the healthcare culture, especially since the patient was a psych case. Overall, perhaps the waiting room should be able to be observed from triage, either by camera or by triage nurse at station. here's crossing fingers that the real reasons behind that come out...

I passed nclex

2008-06-27T14:09:00.002-05:00

I passed with 75 questions! i am a RN!!!!!!!!
it was quick, took me 35 minutes for about 75 questions.....quickest the moderators have ever seen! Whee! Too bad you don't get points for speed! Whoo!

NCLEX IS OVER!

2008-06-25T00:11:00.002-05:00

Well, I'm going to be waiting with baited breath until I get my results...but I FEEL like I did ok. The computer shut off at 75, and I felt like I got at LEAST 15 alternate item and math questions...So, I think that they consider the whole alt items and math as "higher-level" questions. I felt overall confident going in...and the testing center women said I had a record speed...just the way I take tests...75 questions= 1/2 hour. I don't think I was doing soooo bad that I failed horribly...and I think I'd have to be just not recognizing ANYTHING to fail. I didn't come this far just to be turned away....so here's hoping! I'll post back a extra post later today....
On a side note, NOBODY realizes how hard it is to be waiting for the most important test of your life...unless you've taken it or are going to take it. I've slept 3 hours out of the last 30...couldn't sleep but a hour the night before boards...and now my roommate is asking me to "run me up my memory card so I have something to do on my cell phone..." seriously? you KNOW I haven't slept,and I already have nerves about results? And you wake me up after I've fallen asleep? You're a jerk! ok, vent over....

twas the night before NCLEX

2008-06-23T22:40:00.003-05:00

Ok, there is about 13 hours to go.......GEEZ, I just want some sleep! NCLEX will be over tomorrow, and I WILL PASS WITH FLYING COLORS! visualization will be the key! I KNOW that i WILL PASS, and come this time tomorrow I will BE A RN! (although any extra encouragement will be welcome :)
hope all is well in the world with you dear reader....

All you need is love....

2008-06-16T23:16:00.002-05:00

So, I've been taking care of a particular older patient at work....she's had a NG tube, that she pulled out....a G-tube placed...continuous tube feeding, and she had to have wrist restraints so she wouldn't pull anything out....
Most nights, she's been non-verbal...not sleeping, but won't talk and just looks at you....
So, I went in to give her a bath, and per usual, say "How are you tonight?" She looks, waves, and says "ok." Well, I almost dropped the soap! We had a blast for 15 minutes, singing elvis songs and other songs my grandmother taught me while I was washing her up, and then when we got done she says..."ok, I'll see you later!" Throughout the night, she would say "help, help, come on god, help me out here." When I would ask her what she needed, she would only say "Love." I told her, "I love you, you are so agreeable tonight"...."Oh, I love you too, I know you're a good man. Ok, I'm going."
That's why I do what I do....
PS. On a side note, if you have a g/ng tube patient with NPO status...PLEASE make sure they are getting mouthcare, especially if they are getting breathing treatments for mucus...it makes them look and feel much better....

Transitions....

2008-06-16T23:08:00.002-05:00

1. Well, my last shift at work is coming up this friday....and I won't be back to nights until September until the earliest...I'm going to miss all my night shift friends, and I think I'm just going to be getting through the days....
2. I'm looking foward to working with my good NS friend, and I believe that she will be a awesome nurse...I'm trying to convince her to come to nights, because she would be a good fit.
3. I'm nervous, scared, dreading, excited...etc...I just can't believe I am going to be a RN!
4. It's gonna be a long 2 months...so apoligies in advance...I'm going to be posting less frequently, but it is what it is....

Dday is coming....NCLEX!!!!

2008-06-15T05:58:00.003-05:00

Hey, all, just a note....I take boards on June 24th at 2PM....and I'm praying that I pass....I feel relitively confident....just not 100%. I'm quitting my job beforehand and taking 3 days to just hit it hard....I'm hopeful that things work out. Other than that and work, nothing is new here...so I hope all my blogger friends are doing ok!

You can't stop taking care of someone cause you don't like em.

2008-06-07T06:44:00.004-05:00

You know, I normally don't mind working with my friend...we went to NS together, we were closer since we've started working together, but tonight just took the cake. We had a patient who arrived at 2PM from chicago as part of a accident on her drive to TN....she had a PCA pump, fluids, she'd been vomiting a little bit, etc....So, throughout the shift my friend had her...no problems.
The sister shows up as the "family" representitive....Now, everything is wrong. "she's vomiting, what's going on?"(maam, she's had everything she can have, if she quit pushing her PCA q 10 minutes, it'd slow down a little.) "her roommate is snoring, we're going to move to another room.." (maam, the hospital is full...there are NO other beds on this floor to move her to, and I'm not going to wake up 2 people to move your roommate, and someone else, for a non-medical reason.)
These were the ONLY 2 times that I had talked to her about anything all night...I didn't even know what was going on with her really. My friend was so frustrated, she asked me to switch rooms for our final rounds of the night so she wouldn't have to go back in there.....fine, I'll help you out.
The thing that gets me is that there is ALWAYS something about some frustrating patient that gets her riled....and she "can't take it." I honestly don't see how working as a pediatric nurse will get her much more than that....She cannot deal with issues and gets frustrated instead of getting a backbone. She does NOT do enough for patients, and then gets mad when the patients call her on it.
We then got a admit that had bilateral ankle fractures....she asked me to go with her to set him up....why, I'm not sure. She's got 2 hands, with only 1 full with a icebag for each ankle....but I'm game. She put ice on him, dialed a telephone number, and walked out. ME? I've got to set up his urinal and kleenex, verify with the wife that "yes, he's here in the hospital, and not faking cause he doesn't want to work", listen to him rattle on about his story(fell at home cause he had a few too many tequilas), and try to shush him for his roommate. AND HE'S NOT EVEN MY PATIENT!
So, I'm done. I will be more than happy to take care of MY folks, and her folks will get my extra service when I answer their lights....but, I'm not helping her anymore than I have to. Facts of life.

Jim crow is dead....

2008-06-04T22:54:00.003-05:00

It is time for a change...one that can provide the equality of every man...

When this nation was founded,
over two hundred years ago,
the white-wigged whigs proclaimed equality,
as shallow as it could go.

Freedom for the ones who could afford it,
and work til death for the others.
Without the same thoughts or genes,
no sister, brother, or mother of a different color.

We thought the land of lincoln
had fought for the rights of all.
Brother vs. brother for the sake of country,
how many bloodlines had to fall?

Depression hit hard, and we thought
that a light was coming for all.
why is it, that less than 30 years later,
MLK was STILL fighting Jim Crow laws?

Cut off from the process,
with no end in sight.
Voting for many was
just a shot in the night.

It took us over two hundred years,
for the symbol of equality to not be a sham.
now, when ANY child asks if they can be president,
Boy or girl, Black or white, I as a father, can say
"Yes, YOU CAN!"

did someone get the memo I just graduated?

2008-05-30T22:29:00.004-05:00

Seriously...at least here in IL, the money just to take the NCLEX is adding up.
82 bucks for processing, 50 bucks for fingerprints, 200 bucks for computer center testing fees, and that's not even counting the license fee!
Good lord, could someone just do this in installments til I get my Real RN job?
Seriously, that's all I've done lately....Kaplan review, work, and sleep....
Work is work, and I can't wait to give notice....I'd much rather be the nurse for 6-7 patients vs. the total front line for 13/14.....
It's been crazy...we had post-ops all night, including someone arrested for home invasion and tasered(by the cops) in his forehead....little tip folks. Don't bend over when the cop says he's gonna shoot...he's lucky he didn't wind up dead or with some serious seizure activity going on. could've got fried brain syndrome...(like that? it's my new dx)....

why did I spend mega $$$ for this?

2008-05-30T22:23:00.002-05:00

Ok, folks.....coming from a newly graduated RN, I believe the Kaplan review is a rip-off......400 bucks for sitting in a room 4 days...and doing nothing but answering questions and taking 2 knowledge tests? wanting to scream at other people when they are trying to use the "decision tree" and just coming out of left field with some answers?
Seriously, I had to hurry through the questions to figure out the answer first to judge my own knowledge...my notes looked like this: Right: 49 Wrong: 7.....figured that was a good indicator of knowledge....

thought this was good...

2008-05-29T06:17:00.001-05:00

Ok, so don't judge me too harshly but............
30

Created by OnePlusYou - a Free Dating Site

Hey, I've gotta do something to get rid of all the extra frustration I've got over patients.....Posts coming this weekend, when I'm off. Honest.

Hands that heal.....

2008-05-17T10:05:00.002-05:00

Just something I thought of....

Anyone has the capability to heal. A friend, a lover, a family member. Just by being there for a shoulder to cry on, a ear to listen, or a mouth to tell you when things are gonna be ok.

Nurses are people remarkably cut out for the capability to heal. We train to be able to help people help themselves, or take over when they've lost that capability. We give medications to ease pain, we explain what is going to happen when the doctor is not around, we kick a little butt when someone doesn't want to do what they need to do, and we gently ease the transition from life to death.

some lines that I will ALWAYS remember are:
"Hands that heal, hands that love,
They lift you up, when you're not strong enough."

Always remember the simple power of the touch. A squeeze can be all that's needed to bring joy to the person who is locked inside their own head. A warm cloth on the face brings comfort to those who have been sitting in the hospital bed for days. A shave for a old man can bring him from "sick grandpa" to the "dapper dad" his family knows he is.

Never forget what we do. It's so much more than just a job.

had my pinning tonight

2008-05-17T03:11:00.001-05:00

Hey, all...while i'm not an emotional person per se....something about the ceremony really made me tear up. We walked in to a crowd of people in the gym, had the introduction of our speaker (the exec director of our state nurses association) who showed up sick and barely able to talk, give our speech. Gave our retiring professor a basket with cool things.....and as we went up to do our candle lighting ceremony....we dropped hand sanitizer(as she failed EVERYONE on our handwashing demo before) into the basket. Our class VP's daughter performed a song she wrote herself...and it was VERY moving...called "hands that heal".....I almost wish that I had a track of it, cause it was really good.
My good friend was our class president...and as she was talking, and tearing up....my other friend and I asked each other if we were standing up for her....I would without a doubt. She got thrust into the position when our president didn't pass 3rd semester.......hence the promotion of the VP.
She did a remarkable job for what she had to work with....and through all the snafus...I wouldn't have traded a moment of the last 2 years for anything...
The joy, the tears, and the anger of last minute changes were all washed away by the smiles and the joy of tonight. I got many pictures of all my friends who are going to be RNs at the same place where I work....can't wait for boards, and to get started!

pinning is today

2008-05-15T23:06:00.001-05:00

Wow...I can't believe after 2 yrs of NS, 3 yrs of pre reqs....countless lost hours of sleep, many fast-food lunches at clinicals, having to grab instructors for medications, crying over stress, and lost weekends at barnes and noble studying......
PINNING IS TODAY! Practice is at 9AM(Seriously, we couldn't get it stretched out a little? Like 11?), pinning at 7PM...tons of family are coming in today, staying through the weekend, party on Sat, some came in Wed, spent all day thursday with em....wow. I'm already tired, and I know I'm gonna be a emotional wreck tomorrow.....I'll post back and let you all know how it went....

what the heck do I do now?

2008-05-07T17:30:00.000-05:00

Hey, all....just had to post a happy thread today.... I just took my LAST EVER nursing final! Got a 83, so I got a B in the class overall.....and I just realized that I've done nursing almost everyday of my life for the last 2 years.....So, what the heck am I supposed to do now? LOL
It is a sad day too though....one of my good friends missed passing by about 4 points.....1 quiz that she missed near the end for a (not so smart) reason.....I hope that they find points missed during her final review...but I'm not holding out hope. The way things are going, I may be the only male graduating this year.....How weird does that make me look?
On to the NCLEX!!!!

In the dead of night......

2008-05-04T20:05:00.003-05:00

The visitors are gone. You lay sleeping through the night. The beeps of the machines are echoing down the hall, the dinging of call lights wakes you up. "I need a blanket, I want a drink, my pain is high, my a/c is loud, can't you do anything about those people next door?" and so on. I hate to break it to you, but I am here to keep you well.
I will let you vent, but we need to understand each other.
I'm here because I believe there is no higher calling than serving your fellow man. Health is the one thing that everyone must deal with. The touch of a warm cloth in a fever, a quick clean when you lie in your own stool, even a massage when you have some back spasms.
I demand respect. I am not here to be your servant...i'm here to help you become as functional as you can at the moment. I am not here to find 15 chairs for all the family you have here, or get you 3 pepsis when your glucose is over 500. I will not agree with your non-compliance with care. You can choose to do so, however, do NOT yell at me when you can't understand why you aren't doing better.
I vent, I yell, I cry at times.....but I wouldn't trade the moments I've seen for the world.
I like to think that my grandfather had the kind of care that I give everyday. I hope that patients remember me when they leave the hospital...and I know that I won't see many of them again. And I'm ok with that.
so what motivates you to do what you do?

Goodbye frustration....

2008-05-04T18:38:00.002-05:00

So, i was going to rant about the crazy patients I had last night....
But, after taking care of a few old folks, and sleeping, and driving in the wonderful sunshine...and eating dinner outside with a beer and the sunday paper....
My frustration has somehow gone away.....but it did lead to a reflective mood. stay tuned for some kind of post over why I feel healthcare is a calling...not a job.

The curtain is rising.............

2008-04-30T21:45:00.003-05:00

Well....for my fellow friends, I just realized that a LOT has happened over the last few weeks...So, in no particular order comes the following:
Lorenzo's List of Lasts:
1. Had my LAST theory test! (ok, so I wound up with a 78%, but hey, let me revel in that glory for a minute) We spent our last day taking that test, and filling out NCLEX applications. It was kinda nice to say "I now have been taught everything that the school wants to teach me!"
2. Went through my Capstone days....ugh. 36 hrs of working with a staff nurse on a tele floor. First, I'm not a days person. I like having clients asleep for the 2nd half of my shift. I also don't like waking up at 3:30am just to get ready. And my new name for tele? Med-surg for hearts. It was not boring per se, but I didn't feel like I could do a whole lot besides assess and pass meds.....also, during my 2nd day 2nd semester students showed up for most of the day so I only had 2 real patients that were all ours....I did learn about how to deal with patients, and how to try to be the "nurse". Did also pick up some info about heart strips.
3. Took my HESI exit exam....well, i did the best I could..... AND I PASSED!!!! I scored a 922, and passing is a 850. The exam is supposed to weigh questions based on the basic skills of being a RN vs harder questions...like NCLEX. it was 160 questions, took me 2 hours, and most of my friends passed. We got together at the bar for "lunch"....although more drinks were flowing than tears. Some people didn't pass, but they have another chance friday. So need some good wishes towards those friends.
4. Got a job offer from the hospital where I work at now. And it's my shift, and my floor! So, I look forward to changing my job role from tech to RN....and know that I quite honestly couldn't have a better group of people to work with. I believe that I will be trained effectively, and am comfortable with the patients we generally get. Plus, as a confidence booster, I was having break with a nurse the other night and she goes "I wouldn't mind training you, you understand how we are, and you pick things up really fast. However, that other girl(the one I go to school with) gets too stressed, too easy. You gotta be flexible up here." So, I feel better about it. The thing that stinks is that I have to train on days 2-4 weeks....so I'll be dead for a while.

And, for my friend Dawn, pinning is May 16th!!! Can't wait to see what's in the slideshow! Keep the faith!

It's (un)offical!

2008-04-20T20:46:00.002-05:00

I will be offered a job TOMORROW!!!!! I am planning to work on my home floor that I work on as a tech now....figured that I would get the best training being with people that I understand, staff I can trust, knowing who to watch out for, and knowing roughly the procedures/protcols for the general cases we get.....I feel relieved, knowing that I am finally on the way with the first job!!!
Now all I need to do is get through the capstone this week, pass exit on Friday and get ready to graduate!!!!

Last week upcoming..............

2008-04-13T21:19:00.002-05:00

Well, it's offical.....this is the last week of class! I still have assorted finals, NCLEX application day, and capstone to do...but I no longer have to do the theory notes and study powerpoints! It's been a while folks, it's just been busy......
So, what's going on? Well, I had my last week of clinical.....and I was the "charge" student for 2 others.....and I just don't get it....this dude was taking forever to give meds, and I ended up having to give one of his patients meds....when he had 2 hours to give all 5(yeah, only 5) patients meds.....I had 3 of my own, and done with 15 mins to spare.......then the instructor came to find me, because he put heel protectors on wrong....oh, and he's a CNA...should you know what you're doing, or know you need help by the last week?
I had my interview at the hospital I work at....and it went really well....I had to go back to work 2 hours after the interview, so when I went in, my manager told me that it went really well and I gave really "professional" answers....and looked good....So I think that if they offer me my "home" floor, I'll take it. I enjoy the nurses I work with, I feel comfortable with the patients, and I think I'll learn quickly. And I know who I can trust with the other CNAs.....
Hmmmm...what else? Oh yeah, Pinning! I have a TON of family coming in for pinning, which I was not expecting....but it'll be good to see everyone. also, I need ideas on what a guy can wear for pinning that's all white? it's tough to think of the bottom parts!
Overall, school and work....that's life at the moment. But I'm blessed, knowing that I don't have to afford another semester of school.....my fellow blogger Dawn at Overactive Imagination needs some help to afford another semester before aid kicks in....give what you can, and karma comes around.

Save the date....seriously!!!

2008-04-03T19:40:00.002-05:00

Ok, folks....like life wasn't stressful enough with work, projects, tests.....now I have about oh....17 out of 30 dates to remember.....I wouldn't dream of listing them all here, but things such as the following are now in NEON flashing in my brain...(I wouldn't be suprised if the arteries rearrange themselves into letters to be a subconcious reminder...)
Capstone work dates (22,23,24 on 12 hr day shifts on a tele floor at the hospital I work at.), exit testing (25th....hopefully the only date for that I need to remember), psych test (21st), m/s theory test and nclex application filling out(15th....and I need 286 bucks for that day....ouch.) , etc.....and of course pinning (May 16th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....not like I'm excited or anything!)
Also, knowing that I have few readers at the moment, it's good to see those of you that comment.....please know I appreciate it...even if I don't have time to comment back.

Do not stand at my grave and weep........

2008-03-26T20:31:00.003-05:00

That line comes from a song I used to sing in High school."In Memoriam"..and it comes to mind every so often when I'm doing what I do.

Just a reflection....I spent today taking care of a resident who is approaching end of life. And upon my arrival to assess her, I found myself encountering a hospice aide. Wow...I thought I was a good CNA. this aide was there for about 2 hours in a shift, cruising through, did AM care, helped me think of ways to break her 102 degree fever(aside from the g-tube tylenol)...we did cold compressess, mouthcare, fan on back....the aide helped me turn her, helped me find another pressure sore developing on a foot, helped me assess areas that I would have had a tough time doing by myself.
She also talked to the family, helped me finish things up. Then the hospice nurse arrived....wow, she was focused....when we started talking, I mentioned that she already had a order for meds to help congestion, meds for pain sublingual, and was on top of each thing the nurse asked....
Then the family and I talked while I helped turn her, and gave her mouthcare, etc. I'm reminded that, when I'm in the situation at the end of my life, give me my dignity. A drop of water, medication to keep me comfortable, treat my symptoms, but let me die gracefully.

Like a flower slow to open,
this life will soon be done.
my spirit will be soaring,
for the race I finally have won.

I'm headed home to eden,
No pain can find me now.
Sunshine always upon me,
without a single dark cloud.

I will be with you in the dew,
the life I've left behind.
Never forget who I am,
and I'll always be alive in your mind.

Hug your loved ones tighter today....and give kind care to whoever you encounter....and to my fellow student nurses(never forget that the care you give is watched by EVERYONE related to the patient!)

The care you get.....

2008-03-24T15:14:00.002-05:00

Sometimes I'm reminded of the old beatles song....the care you get is equal to the care you give. I think that even though patients are sick, in pain, having to deal with dx's, etc....most are willing to treat the staff well, and understand that if they need something that is not pressing...they follow up with "when you have time."
I personally have a issue with taking that to mean "when you get around to it." I provide EXCELLENT service, (as far as I know), and would rather go get what someone needs right away, versus having to remember to come back in 20 mins....besides, I'm a little slow to begin with.
Remember the reason that we are there, folks. We nurse because we care. If we didn't, why are we here? I will rue the day that I'm a patient, and I know the kind of service that I would expect....however, if I can still get up with a walker and go get some water....I'll probably do that myself, to relieve the burden.
off to work.....and spend the night listening to moonbeam conversations, and women who want breakfast at 2AM....

Days counting down....

2008-03-24T15:09:00.002-05:00

So with two tests left in psych and theory....3 clinicals left for med/surg and psych, and 2 weeks of capstone to go.....It's REALLY starting to hit home that I'm almost done with school, and will be expected to be taking care of patients nursing wise in about 3 months....WOW. The most telling factor was today, when I was working on finishing my demos in the skills lab(which are NOW all done.), and my clinical instructor also gave me back my careplan.....the big 14 page one, that I had been dreading for 2 weeks, worried I was going to get it back, and have to revise over a week....nope. Got it back with comments, but overall it was good...and she didn't even mark on the last 4 pages! Sweet!
So, then on to the job hunt. I've got an interview at my hospital on the 2nd, and follow-ups on friday down at urbana....so we'll see what happens.

Where to work.....

2008-03-22T05:52:00.002-05:00

OK.....so blogger ticked me off and I have to repost the entire thing.....arrgghh...

Am I just fooling myself? Am I going to end up working on the floor I work on now? I know I'll learn a lot of skills...and have patients from total self care, to the nursing home completely dependent patients....We get patients with all sorts of tubes, lots of ICU transfers, etc. We have the rep of being the toughest floor on the hospital. Would I just get in a lot of skills, and then go on to another department in a year or two? Plus, I know i could count on the aides(those I trust), my fellow nurses, my night crew...etc. know the docs, know the protcols, know what to do for the majority of the patients....
Or do I really want ER, ICU, tele? ER- not so much right out of school....I feel like I need to establish my baseline, and get good skills down...then do them again. Plus, I dunno if I can handle the senseless deaths.....ICU- again, not right away...every time I tech up there, I'm total teching...and running...and there's so many things to do with very borderline patients.....
tele? Maybe, once I get those chest stickies down....again though, they are just stable enough for the floor somedays, and then have lots of codes/emergencies happen....to anyone that remembers what it's like to be the fresh RN...how do you decide?
also I have follow-up interviews at another hospital...2nd choice. I really want to follow through, just to ensure that I have job offers if my own hospital(for whatever reason) doesn't offer me a job, or one that I feel I want. Tele up there and they pay for ACLS, and tele cert.....I'd rather just go out of pocket if my own hospital won't pay for it, since it wouldn't be part of my job on neuro/ortho. good idea?

spring break...and recruitment dinners

2008-03-18T19:08:00.004-05:00

So, what have I done with the first few days of break? Slept, did laundry, shopped a little, and that's it.....
Looking forward to relaxing, and my big interview tomorrow at the trauma I center for their ICU and their step-down unit. Hopefully, will be worthwhile for the trip. It's an hour away, and if I get it, I'll have to move down there. Would be a neat place to work.
On the other hand, I wound up going to the recruitment dinner at the hospital where I work. It was ok, but quite hokey. they did make some good points about education, magnet journey and so forth. However, I heard from other staff that my own manager tried telling people that the ratio was 1:5....plenty of nights the nurses are running at 7-8:1 and have admits or transfers coming. If I do end up working there, I want to work in the ICU or on my own unit...it's such a challenge to figure it out. just a thought....if I worked on my own unit, would the aides respect me, or figure that I should do their work as well as mine? As opposed to ICU where I'm doing all total care without aides? Just another challenge to figure out...

now THAT's what I'm talking about....

2008-03-04T05:39:00.002-06:00

If you ever have a God complex...come by my floor. My patient tonight kept yelling "god, help, god, help" over and over...well, apparently she meant me. Rock out....
Work is work....such as it is at the moment. I keep wondering what's going to happen when I put in my notice when I get my first RN job....keep on short staffing is my guess....
School-wise, I'm DONE with my big 40 page project for legal issues class....finally. Got a test today at 12, so I probably should be sleeping, but I'm too jazzed at the moment. Looking forward to clinicals this week, and just getting things done.
On the romance front....anyone know HOW frustrating it is to be going to school with lots of women who mostly are married or in serious relationships? I finally got a match.com membership and have already hit it off with 2, count em, 2 women in a week! Whee me! Too early for some things, but I'm looking forward to getting to know them both.
All for now....and if anyone is looking for some good folk music check out www.ellispaul.com good singer/songwriter guy and I'm going to see him in chitown this month!

A wee sweater is all I want.....

2008-03-01T06:35:00.003-06:00

So, when you're running a 101 fever, sweating profusely, and were found in your front yard....you'd like a sweater. I wish I could help you out, I really do. I don't care about what the nurse told me "found in front yard, tested positive for alcohol, cocaine, and mary-jane...." I don't care that you think the doc is crazy. Nobody cares what brought you here. For my shift, I keep you alive/breathing and keep your temperature somewhere in the neighborhood of "viable".
Nobody told you you HAD to stick that needle in your arm. Nobody asked you to come to the hospital tonight. Nobody cares why you did it.
I certainly wish I could yell some sense into you. While you rant and rave, I have a gentleman next door who is slightly confused and convinced that he's a bother and should just pass on tonight. He's sorry he needs me for something as simple as a hot blanket.....and you know what? You ranting will not get you something any faster than I will get it.
I do what I have to to keep you around. When you're not here, I won't care what you do.
"The one who rants and raves like a fool, will be suprised when others fail to pay him dues.
The silent one who sits like rock, this is the one that will pass the clock. "
Good night, kind sir.

When the nursing student gets sick....

2008-02-21T15:10:00.003-06:00

So....I'm sick. Not your typical "oh, I'm a little stuffy, little cough, feel like crud, just need to sleep sick." This is your "My sinuses feel like I've had nasal surgery with extra packing, If I blew my nose outside I think my snotball would go into orbit, I'm coughing up stuff that has NO business being in my lungs, etc.
I've already called off for tonight, and hoping that I don't need to again tomorrow. I could really use a decent paycheck for a change.
So, what do I do? Well, so far nothing, but if I get the energy back, I'm going to spend my sick day writing presentation summaries, finding articles to write summaries for, and read chapters in my med-surg book.
I've got ice cream(not nutritious, but tastes good on a sore throat.), soup, noodles, and a PB sandwich planned for dinner. Planning on sitting in the shower for 20-30 mins later to break up the congestion. Drinking water continousely, to thin out said congestion....and hoping I don't have to answer the phone tonight as "I canot snd rite...tink I'm gona heck upp a lug.."
nite all....at 3:15PM....

If I had a call light for the world....

2008-02-17T06:09:00.002-06:00

Sometimes, I can't understand timing...people who miss getting hit by seconds, who step off into traffic blindly to get to the other side...and make it. Lovers who miss finding others by minutes, because they didn't want to go somewhere new. People who seek attention by finding things for you to do every 3-5 mins.....
tonight, one of my patients was random, run of the mill, back problem....who proceeded to ask me to help turn on side....then on back...then on side...then on back...interspersed with bedpan times...even though I'd just set her up 5 mins ago....the longest break I got from her from 10Pm to 5AM? 15 mins.....

I look through my last posts and realize that I've got a lot of negative thoughts up there...so I thought I'd end tonight with a positive......
The best feeling in the world is discharging someone who has spent over a week on your unit...when you get to know them, their family, their dx, their history almost like your own....someone had been with us for 3 weeks, the night he was due to leave.....Hit the floor. Cramping, abd pain....just crazy pain...and he'd been good the entire week...totally unlike him...Ran him down to CT....liver laceration...probably had been going the entire week....goes to show that had we sent him home during the day...he might not have made it...ICU/Surgery/ then another day out the door.....finally...I keep waiting to see if he's coming back...hope not.

clinicals SUCK!!

2008-02-13T22:17:00.003-06:00

Ok, normally I feel so put together....at least enough so I can give adequate care to my patients....Today? WHOLE other story....only 4 patients but I had a lady who was already having issues, snoring (while waking up long enough to rate pain at 10/10), I did my best to help her be cooperative in her care, but she wouldn't leave her oxygen on 1/2 the dang time! NO wonder she was complaining of being short of breath, pulse ox in 80s, etc..... I felt like the guy in this pic....

Then, I had another patient who was the Sweetest former nurse...she was so willing to let me do things that I had to with her, like draw blood, start a new IV, give meds, etc....
Just tough to give care, it's a problem when you have to do things and the patients doesn't want you to do much and what you DO want to do, they won't let you.....
School wise, things are good. Getting B's in theory and trying to pass other things...tomorrow is a day with "dear old dad". I love him, but days with him are sometimes a shot of never knowing what's in store exactly.....so, will probably not get anything done tomorrow.....
Gotta sleep, I'm beat from the week, and it's only WENDSDAY!!!!!

Polish is as polish does......

2008-02-10T21:27:00.001-06:00

Nice, eh? That's what I was faced with last night, 2 hours of popping in on a 87 yo woman in for hip surgery. She kept trying to get out of bed, and after a few times of explaining that she was in her bed for the 87th time...I just couldn't deal anymore. I explained that everytime she was crooked I had to fix her hip, and I also had to roll her around more and more.....sry, but that's what I do. She let loose a stream of polish words (I think most were swears....at least that's what the raised middle fingers seemed to be telling me). Then, when I explained "maam, you'll need to speak english, not polish...I can't understand polish." she then replied with the title of this post.
ARRGGHHHH....at least I get a good jump at studying psych nursing with patients like this. All take care and stay warm as it's about ohhhhhh -10 here before wind chill......peace.

Crazy, no YOU'RE CRAZY!!!!

2008-02-09T15:32:00.000-06:00

Ok, so sitting here waiting for dinner....before going back to the wonderful world of work.....Sometimes I have to laugh(not AT patients, per se, but what their proccesses do to their already percarious mental state.) Last night, most of my patients were pretty good. However, the older lady with a busted hip couln't understand WHY her hip was hurting and kept yelling at me (I think it was swearing, but the english word she kept saying was ****, so I feel safe in that assumption).
Then we had another post surgery patient. 4 days after surgery and she's still demented. I don't think that qualifies as post-op dementia...I think we've crossed that line. Now, she kept going on on her husband and brother in law sleeping together, and called the woman who was sitting with her "Al" the entire night......poor lady, comes into work and gets a sex change!
She slept most of the night, until 3:30 AM, then starting swearing up and down about her husband, then other staff lying to her, etc.....finally got her calmed down with a cup of hot tea, and started to take her bp. "you arent' touching me!, etc" Could be worse, apparently she started screaming help at the top of her lungs the other night at 5AM.....Yikes.
Now it's time to go back to the business, and get up tomorrow, and study!!!! I need to hit the books hard for psych and med/surg.....ARGGGHHHH! I hate psych....it's like taking pharm over 2 weeks instead of a semester....ok, nite for now.

Greed........how quickly it corrupts......

2008-02-06T19:57:00.000-06:00

So, Deal or No deal? 1,000/200,000 or 110,000....I'd take the 110,000. You could pay off school, buy something nice, invest some, and give some charity out to the good people in your life........So, guess what? The chick said no, and won 1,000 bucks. Why does greed overcome our sense? You can take something for sure, or lose it all.

Nothing else is true. Someone else will always have a better car, a better job, a better lover, a better family, better stuff....the key is learning to be happy with what you CAN have, not with want you WANT to have.

on a NS note, what a crazy day in clinical. lots of ICU stuff to do, and crazy things with families and patients trying to tell us what we needed to do! I understand what you want, but this is stuff I HAVE to do, and I cannot do x because it's not good for you or your family member.....geez. I know nursing is over 50% customer service, but if you ever have someone in the hospital, please take the time to remember your family member is not the ONLY patient there. Nurses do the best we can, when we can.

Ok, off to bed soon, later.

My first post.....

2008-02-05T19:48:00.000-06:00

Well, I'm new to the blogosphere, so here's my first post.....

What am I thinking today? The word is ROUGH.....the world is rough. People go through the motions of life, and never think about what they really give to people. My patients are part of the reason I go to work....but the families are tough when they make 123 demands in 5 mins and it's for things you can't do.
I wish I could help you, I really do. But, A kind request may make me a lot happier to comply with a question, then a demand. The next time you try to act all uppity...please remember I will probably take a little longer for you than I would at any other time.

Also, I hurt, I'm tired, and I'm sick of doing things today. The world is rough, and today is the chance to make a change. I voted today, did you? I believe that Obama is the way to go. and he will make the world take notice.

alright, I'm off to bed. We will be doing this again. I like online journaling...it lets you get it out there. Peace!